Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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