The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
