i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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