im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
two words: eviction party
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize
