I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
