she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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