Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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