You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
