I wish I could punch you in the face.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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