what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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