i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
