dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
