I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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