I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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