the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.�
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
