just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
