well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
