Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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