Don't make out with my wife yet
where am i from again
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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