Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
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