overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
