"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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