apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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