question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
