just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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