Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
The air was thick with penises
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
