A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
