I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
