After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
