You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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