Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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