Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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