Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I need a beard to bite.
You left your phone here
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