I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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