I was born with a shot glass in my hand
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
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