I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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