They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Acid is not a monday night drug
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Maybe he injected his testicle?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
