I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
