Little spoons don't ask big questions
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
