The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
