He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
