things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Randomize