is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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