So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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