? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
