it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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