well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
