i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
