She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
it's great music for shaving your balls
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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