so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize