i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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