Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
